By Victoria Gladstone
Former Editor-in-Chief
Scattered around campus, you can find painted river rocks crafted with joyous messages and colorful designs. These pieces of hope are placed by one of the College’s very own staff members looking to spread an important message.
Heather Boccanfuso, a facilities business operations manager who has worked at the College for 17 years, lost her son Michael Zuccarello this past June to suicide. He was 16 and a rising senior at Lawrenceville High School.
With hopes of spreading positivity on campus, Boccanfuso began painting rocks to be placed anywhere in sight of students. She uses painting as a way to channel her grief and thinks about Zuccarello and his interests when creating her designs.
“Sometimes I’ll walk over to the bench and I’ll see some students there and I’ll just hand them out,” said Boccanfuso. “I just feel like Michael needs to keep going in this world.”
Many of these rocks are painted with the phrase “Be Kind 4 Michael,” the saying now used to continue Zuccarello’s story and remind others to stay kind to others.
Michael’s favorite quote etched onto the bench honoring his life, along with a recent portrait (Photo by Victoria Gladstone).
In remembrance of Zuccarello, a bench dedicated in his honor was placed on campus facing Lake Sylva, at a spot where he and his brother Mark would spend time and fish. Using leftover teakwood from old benches on campus, the facilities department made it by hand, including a sunset design intertwined to showcase Zuccarello’s favorite time of day.
Boccanfuso told The Signal in an interview that “Michael grew up at TCNJ,” and he frequently visited campus with her when he was younger. He loved walking around campus to visit the planetarium, create things at the wood shop and eat at Eickhoff Hall.
Zuccarello loved the College and had intentions of applying to the institution upon his high school graduation, according to his mother.
Ella Shevchuk, a freshman history and secondary education major, frequently sits at the bench to find peace. On one special day, she discovered a new friendship in Boccanfuso.
Shevchuk met Boccanfuso on an afternoon at the bench when both individuals were having particularly hard days. The pair ended up sitting together and talking for hours about life. Since then, the two have remained in contact and often meet at the bench made for Zuccarello.
“After meeting with Heather for the first time, my perspective changed almost entirely,” said Shevchuk. “Our relationship and close friendship has first [handedly] demonstrated the power of unconditional kindness and compassion. Her immense kindness and love she has shown me even throughout her grief is inspiring.”
Since meeting, Shevchuk says Boccanfuso and the “Be Kind 4 Michael” movement have uplifted her spirit and inspired her to do the same on campus. She intends to start a club centered around painting rocks as a symbol of remembrance for Zuccarello.
“I find it easy to get lost in work and I tend to struggle prioritizing my mental and physical health,” said Shevchuk. “However, after seeing Heather's immense dedication and commitment to spreading Michael’s message of being kind to ourselves and others, it helps me to take a step back.”
Boccanfuso is currently in the process of starting “Michael’s Mission,” a program she wants to create to help ensure all students at Zuccarello’s high school can afford lunch. Boccanfuso explained that her son would use his own lunch money in school to buy food for his peers.
For now, a fundraiser has been launched to begin raising money to start the initiative. To donate, the fundraiser can be found at GiveAHand.com/fundraiser/michaels-mission.
Boccanfuso, along with painting rocks and making beaded bracelets for her son, has also created an Instagram page, @Kindness_Rocks_For_Michael, to further spread her message.
Mental health resources:
Counseling and Prevention Services (CAPS)
Eickhoff Hall, Suite 107
To access services, click here.
TCNJ Campus Police
Dial 911 from any campus phone or 609-771-2345 from a cell phone.
Suicide and Crisis Lifeline
Call 988
Dean of Students
If you would like to submit a CARE referral for yourself or someone you may know, click here.
