By Ally Uhlendorf
Managing Editor
Patricia Harp, President Michael A. Bernstein’s partner of 23 years, was the embodiment of generosity and kindness. On Sept. 23, Harp died due to complications from Alzhimer’s disease, leaving behind a legacy of warmth and love.
Born and raised in Montana with her brother and two sisters, Harp’s early experiences shaped the kind of person she was — a humble, generous person who always wanted to give back to others.
“I think that had a lot to do with her background. She grew up in very modest circumstances in Montana, where she did not have a lot as a child,” Bernstein said in an interview with The Signal.
Harp attended business school for around 10 months, where she learned dictation and typing skills. Not long after, the Trans-Alaska Pipeline System project began.
“That project started and Patti and her inimitable, no-nonsense decision making style reasoned they would need a lot of bookkeepers out there,” Bernstein said. “So, she was right and moved to Anchorage. She was in Anchorage for a year and a half.”
Afterwards, Harp had saved up her money and moved to California, where she met Bernstein.
Harp and Bernstein were introduced to each other in early 2001 by a fellow colleague at the University of California, San Diego, where Harp was a management services officer and Bernstein was a faculty member. Their connection grew from a simple friendship to a loving partnership that would span over two decades.
In the summer of 2007, Bernstein became the provost at Tulane University in New Orleans, where he and Harp moved together. Harp decided to retire that year.
“She enjoyed retirement, she never looked back again,” Bernstein said. “The leadership at Tulane was interested in offering her a job — she said ‘No, I’m not interested in the job.’”
After living in New Orleans for about nine years, Bernstein left Tulane and was subsequently hired as the provost at Stony Brook University in Long Island, where they resided for four years.
In 2017, the couple’s lives took an unfortunate turn. Harp was suddenly diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease.
The two then returned to San Diego, where they have had a home ever since they met. A year and a half ago, Bernstein was offered the position of interim president here at the College. At the same time, Harp fell ill after years of progressive sickness. Harp remained in San Diego for the rest of her life.
“Alzhimer’s disease is a progressive illness,” Bernstein said. “That was a hard road.”
The couple’s years together were filled with cherished memories, especially with Bernstein’s daughters from his previous marriage. When Harp entered their lives, the girls were 11 and 5 years old, and she had been part of their lives ever since.
“She became a significant female presence in their lives,” he said. “Her death has been hard on all of us, especially my daughters.”
Harp was more of a quiet person, but also an extremely generous person.
“She was very thoughtful about others, she had very good instincts about others,” Bernstein said. “She was immensely generous, but she never wanted much for herself.”
Bernstein reflected on a memory, taking place on Christmas when he bought expensive jewelry for Harp and she got angry at him, as she felt it was not necessary.
“She said to me, ‘Why are you spending all this money?’ But she would go out and buy jewelry for others,” Bernstein said.
Harp also had a knack for design and fashion. She enjoyed clothes, interior design and all things in that area.
“On our first date, I showed up and had a sports jacket on. She looked at the jacket and said, ‘It looks like you lost a bet,’” Bernstein said. “I never wore the jacket again.”
In Harp and Bernstein’s honor, the College’s Board of Trustees has endowed a scholarship fund in their names. It will be for transfer students with financial need.
“It struck me that this would be a nice opportunity, and it also resonates with Patti’s experiences since she never had the opportunity to go to college,” Bernstein said. “I’m quite confident she would have been very excited about it.”
Anyone wishing to honor Harp’s memory can make a donation to the scholarship fund. To donate, visit the College’s fundraising site and select “President Michael A. Bernstein Endowed Fund” in the “Designation” drop-down menu.
“She was the love of my life,” Bernstein said.
